[ajhallfr]

So this is probably going to be more of a rant than anything, but I'm curious how everyone deals with a friend who is constantly late for fishing?

I have a buddy, known him since college (15+ years). Super nice guy, loves the outdoors, but is always late for whatever time he tells me he can meet up. Not like 5 minutes late, but 30 minutes to an hour. Problem being, he's usually the only guy I can get to go with only a days notice. I'd love to go without him when he's late, but not really an option. I usually even tell him to meet me a half hour earlier than I need him somewhere, but I think he's caught on.

Curious how everyone else deals with a good friend that does this.

 

[ESOX]

Leave him on shore a few times. That will cure him.
I have a nephew-in-law I took a day off to take fishing. No call, no show at the ramp. No call all day. Called him when I got home, he said he overslept like it was no big deal. He hasn't been invited on my boat since, and that was 8 years ago and he has repeatly hinted he wanted to go out. . No patience for rudeness.


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[JohnP123]

IMO, if it’s a pattern of behavior it will be nearly impossible for YOU to do anything about it other than tolerate it or move on to another fishing partner. That kind of change needs to come from the individual.


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[sureshot006]

Caught on? As in if you're not clearly pissed he's late, it is acceptable to be even later? Nice...

I've been fortunate in that everyone I fish with is always on time. The one guy that wasn't legitimately made a wrong turn and cost him 15 minutes.

The first thing that comes to mind is straight up telling him it sucks that he's ALWAYS late and you wish he would make an effort to be on time.

 

[Botiz]

You just need to show up a half hour late. Problem solved.

 

[ajhallfr]

You just need to show up a half hour late. Problem solved.

The one time I had to cancel on him last minute, last year, he was royally pissed. He told me he took time off work and couldn't get that back. I yelled at him that my time is worth something too. He was good a couple weeks after that...

 

[ajhallfr]

And he just showed up... an hour late

 

[sureshot006]

You just need to show up a half hour late. Problem solved.

He is essentially showing up a half hour late by telling the guy 30 min early

 

[sureshot006]

And he just showed up... an hour late

Time for a "difficult conversation"

 

[motoscoota]

IDK, my fishing partner on the CA West Coast was often late by 45 mins, up to 1.5 hours, and it was aggravating at first, but then he'd have fresh bait, and/or beer & goodies, and fresh ideas of technique, location, etc. He hiked a tent in when we needed shade. He let me sob at his house about girls. He did some boat repairs. He always picked up when I called and so on.

I tolerated his lateness because he basically came thru in other ways, and some mornings I didn't make it on time either.

I guess it depends on the bigger equation.

 

[sureshot006]

If straight up asking him to be on time is going to break the friendship I'm not sure it's worth maintaining.

 

[onlinebiker]

I had no idea that the fish were on such a tight timetable.......

 

[Swampbuckster]

I had no idea that the fish were on such a tight timetable.......

It’s not that they are, it’s just that for all the preparations necessary that go into a fishing or hunting or ANY trip for that matter, being timely is just the thing to do. No one should have to wait especially if they are the ones supplying the boat, shanty, or hunting property for that matter. For hunting, waterfowl especially down to the minute planning is crucial! And for even fish, why not spend every minute of the planned trip doing what you intended on doing? For times I’ve been invited along on trips, I’m on time or early. And if I’m running behind for some unplanned reason up to the minute phone calls are in order to ensure the person I’m meeting knows exactly where I’m at and when I will be arriving. It’s easy this day in age with cell phones, satellites, gps, and down to the second mapping. The only real reason for habitually being late is you don’t care or are just plain lazy.

 

[Sasquatch Lives]

Leave his ass the next time he's late and tell him about all the fish you caught.

 

[Botiz]

Just be honest with him. Tell him that he is routinely late to the agreed upon time, which leaves you waiting around and it frustrates you. A true friend will be understanding. If he’s hostile about it, it’s unfortunately time to move on.

 

[Swampbuckster]

I no longer fish with a few friends solely because they can’t show up on time. The 5 minute thing, ok. But the 20, 30, 45 minutes behind? Blowing up their phone to see if they are even alive? .

Nope. Last guy regularly late every time. He drove an hour to meet me. Night prior I told him the time to arrive. Said if your 5 minutes late I’m gone and you can Meet me at the launch (hour from my house). I waited 12 minutes. Never called him. I left headed to the launch. He calls me as I was a mile down the road. Told him hey meet me at the launch that’s where I’ll be. He didn’t and turned around and went home. Haven’t asked him since.

 

[Jiw275]

It’s not that they are, it’s just that for all the preparations necessary that go into a fishing or hunting or ANY trip for that matter, being timely is just the thing to do. No one should have to wait especially if they are the ones supplying the boat, shanty, or hunting property for that matter. For hunting, waterfowl especially down to the minute planning is crucial! And for even fish, why not spend every minute of the planned trip doing what you intended on doing? For times I’ve been invited along on trips, I’m on time or early. And if I’m running behind for some unplanned reason up to the minute phone calls are in order to ensure the person I’m meeting knows exactly where I’m at and when I will be arriving. It’s easy this day in age with cell phones, satellites, gps, and down to the second mapping. The only real reason for habitually being late is you don’t care or are just plain lazy.

I agree with you that no one should have to wait. Why are you encouraging his bad behavior?

When I worked and carpooled I explained to my riders what time the “bus” left and that I did not wait. Had some fast learners and some angry people.

 

[DirtyCuffs]

Straightforward convo....minus the yelling. Yelling causes animosity and people just shut down listening. Be open and try to help him understand the hardship on your end. Because it sounds like he is too selfish to do so as it is now.

If it was me, I'd be done. I will admit I am quick to cut people out of my life that I view as negative. But this kind of stuff would drive me nuts. Tardiness pisses me off. But I was raised by two parents who were both staff sergeants in the Army so I guess it was instilled in me to always be on time

 

[Jerry Lamb]

I had this problem AM duck hunting when we were young. A couple of chronically late guys. A passive aggressive way to control a situation. I instituted the 5 Minute Rule:
You are given the time. You have 5 minutes grace period. Then the boat leaves.
I had a guy drive from Birmingham to Deckers Landing at 4:00AM. I missed him by 5 minutes.
It never happened again.

 

[Shoeman]

I've left a few at the dock and that was before cell phones. No excuse now days