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View Full Version : Darwin Award - How NOT to sex a bear




Beave
01-29-2003, 09:23 AM
2002) Mr. Fritz Dekker, a 41-year-old visitor to an Amsterdam zoo, found his way to the bear exhibit. A bystander remembers Fritz asking whether the bear was s a male or female. Nobody knew, so Fritz Dekker decided to find out for himself.
Fritz climbed over the 7-foot fence and jumped into the enclosure. Despite urgent calls from the crowd, Fritz approached the bear in question. The 390-pound adult was quietly occupied with a ball, and unaware of the intruder. Amazingly, Fritz was able to take an unintrusive peek under the hood. Still perplexed, Fritz tried to determine the animal's gender experimentally by delivering a good, hard kick between its legs.

Our friend Fuzzy turned out to be a male, and responded to the assult in a typical male bear fashion. He roared in pain, and charged towards Fritz, who attempted to defend himself with a hasty karate kick in the general direction of the bear while he ran for the fence. This brilliant defense tactic failed completely, and Fuzzy proceeded to occupy the next few minutes mauling Fritz "Bear Ball Buster" Dekker to death.

Zoo keepers arrived promptly, but not promptly enough to save the life of the ill-fated Fritz. Several rounds of tranquilizer darts later, the subdued bear was taken to the onsite veterinarian. Fritz was, of course, pronounced dead at the scene.

An autopsy shed no light on the reason for Fritz's actions. There were no drugs or alcohol in his system, and his family reported that he was not suicidal, nor did they know of any mental defects other than "an exagerated sense of bravado."

Apart from a pair of badly swollen testicles, the bear was uninjured.




jefrat72
01-29-2003, 10:40 AM
Not that I enjoy of hearing about someone die, but that is one of the funniest things I have read in awhile. To kick a bear in the nuts........ man, the word moron doesn't even begin to cover it :rolleyes:

dieseldude
01-29-2003, 10:41 AM
Thanks for the laugh!

fishwitch44
01-29-2003, 11:05 AM
not funnh he died but that shoulda been in the comedy forum...hahahahahahahhhhhhhhahahahahhahaha :D :cool: :cool:

YPSIFLY
01-29-2003, 11:32 AM
I think its hillarious that the guy died.

Not only did his death provide entertainment, but he killed himself in a way that didn't really endanger others.

Good for him!

Amsterdam huh? They have a lot more than just alcohol in that town!:eek:

msiebers
01-29-2003, 05:10 PM
Jjust goes to show you, some people are terminally stupid...:o :p