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Shoeman
01-27-2003, 08:35 AM
Moses and Jesus were in a threesome playing golf one day. Moses pulled
up to
the tee and drove a long one. The ball landed in the fairway, but
rolled
directly toward a water hazard. Quickly Moses raised his club, the
water
parted and it rolled to the other side, safe and sound.

Next, Jesus strolled up to the tee and hit a nice long one directly
toward
the same water hazard. It landed right in the center of the pond and
kind of
hovered over the water. Jesus casually walked out on the pond and
chipped
the ball onto the green.

The third guy got up and randomly whacked the ball. It headed out over
the
fence and into oncoming traffic on a nearby street. It bounced off a
truck
and hit a nearby tree. From there, it bounced onto the roof of a shack
close
by and rolled down into the gutter, down the drain spout, out onto the
fairway and straight toward the aforementioned pond. On the way to the
pond,
the ball hit a stone and bounced out over the water onto a lily pad,
where
it rested quietly. Suddenly a very large bullfrog jumped up on a lily
pad
and snatched the ball into his mouth. Just then, an eagle swooped down
and
grabbed the frog and flew away. As they passed over the green, the
frog
squealed with fright and dropped the ball, which bounced right into the
cup
for a hole in one.

Moses turned to Jesus and said, "I hate playing with your Dad."




ESOX
01-27-2003, 09:20 AM
LOL My Dad will love that one.

DaveW731
01-27-2003, 11:12 AM
Great joke: I heard this variation on the same theme:

Moses and Jesus stepped up to the tee of a 510 yard par 5, with a water hazard out at 350. Moses hit the best drive of his life, but unfortunately the ball ran too well and made it into the water on the third bounce.
"Nice drive, Moses", Jesus said, "but watch me carry it!"
With that, Jesus teed up, took his stance and swung so hard that the carbon shaft on his driver flexed at least 20 degrees. Unfortunately, the ball landed square in the middle of the pond. Moses and Jesus walked to the water, Moses parted it with his staff and hit his second shot. With a sigh, Jesus walked on the water to his ball, raised it to the surface and hit his second shot.
A little later, another golfer who witnessed the whole thing asked Moses, "Who does that guy think he is....Jesus? No one can carry that water hazard!"
"No", Moses said, "He IS Jesus...He THINKS he's Tiger Woods!"

Joe_G
03-20-2004, 02:51 PM
:D