How To Be A Good Liberal

[eyecatcher]

How To Be A Good Liberal

17 WAYS TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln.

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

17. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspirace

GOD BLESS AMERICA Oops, can't do that either

[fasthunter]

Interesting:D ............................and true...DOH!!!:hide:

[2PawsRiver]

Would be funny if it wasn't true.:)

[det07]

.....

18. Must Have no military background

19. Wants to withdraw troops immediatly from Iraq

20. Believe that President Bush should be Impeached and be replaced with Hillary Clinton

[TrailFndr]

21. Know that no matter what you say, someone on this board will call you a liberal even though you aren't, simply because they all blindly follow one another, and none of them have a mind of thier own.

[Jackster1]

.....

18. Must Have no military background


Are you sure about that blanket statement? :lol:
That would include Cheney, Engler, part-timer Bush, the rest of the Bush family, Ms. Rice...

[det07]

Are you sure about that blanket statement?
That would include Cheney, Engler, part-timer Bush, the rest of the Bush family, Ms. Rice...

But Cheny has shot someone before, and Bush is from Texas. So that makes up for it.

[QuickStrike]

How To Be A Good Liberal

17 WAYS TO BE A GOOD LIBERAL

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

12. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln.

14. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

15. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

17. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspirace

GOD BLESS AMERICA Oops, can't do that either

1. You have to be grammatically challenged (see #17 above).

2. You have to be snowed enough to think the above list applies to all liberal thought.

[fasthunter]

Are you sure about that blanket statement? :lol:
That would include Cheney, Engler, part-timer Bush, the rest of the Bush family, Ms. Rice...
I'm pretty conservative, but that's a good point:lol: . (About the military part.) See I can laugh at both sides once in a while;) .

[QuakrTrakr]

1. You have to be grammatically challenged (see #17 above).

2. You have to be snowed enough to think the above list applies to all liberal thought.
22. Liberals are preoccupied with symantics.

[Shupac]

1. You have to be grammatically challenged (see #17 above).

2. You have to be snowed enough to think the above list applies to all liberal thought.

Those, plus you need to believe that stereotypes tell the truth.

[fasthunter]

[quote=fasthunter]I'm pretty conservative, but that's a good point:lol: . (About the military part.) See I can laugh at both sides once in a while;) . Although, now that I think of it George Bush Senior was in WWII and was a pilot.

[Ole Spike]

23. When faced with a budget deficit, you believe it is much better to RAISE taxes 2% than to LOWER gov't spending by 2%. ;)

[WILDCATWICK]

Another constructive thread started......oh well at least you are consistant with your hate.

[QuakrTrakr]

Another constructive thread started......oh well at least you are consistant with your hate.
Where did any use the word hate? Other than you? Just opinions. :confused:
24. Try to get the public emotion involved. All rationality will soon leave.

[WILDCATWICK]

Where did any use the word hate? Other than you? Just opinions. :confused:
24. Try to get the public emotion involved. All rationality will soon leave.


It's just another post amongst many that are generalizations of liberals that are not fact and are spiteful. If you don't see it I can't explain it to ya. I don't know one liberal who subcribes to most of those accusations.

This is not a constructive post or even one that there merits debate. Same thing that many conservatives accuse of "Liberals" of doing. He may be acting more like Dems that cry about everything but offers no solutions than acting like a good constructive Republican or conservative.

opinion....yep but that's all that has been offered up on this thread anyway.

[QuakrTrakr]

It's just another post amongst many that are generalizations of liberals that are not fact and are spiteful. If you don't see it I can't explain it to ya. I don't know one liberal who subcribes to most of those accusations.

This is not a constructive post or even one that there merits debate. Same thing that many conservatives accuse of "Liberals" of doing. He may be acting more like Dems that cry about everything but offers no solutions than acting like a good constructive Republican or conservative.

opinion....yep but that's all that has been offered up on this thread anyway.
Chill dude. I saw humour in these posts. If you didn't, maybe your offended.

[chinamigarden]

Guys,

This is in the humor section. It was supposed to be a joke. If you don't like a joke you don't laugh at it. The best way to respond is with humor in mind come up with a list of points on How to be a good conservative.

[WILDCATWICK]

My bad. I thought it was originally posted in the Political threads.

As a joke I have no problem.:p

[quest32a]

Guys,

This is in the humor section. It was supposed to be a joke. If you don't like a joke you don't laugh at it. The best way to respond is with humor in mind come up with a list of points on How to be a good conservative.
This thread was acutally started in the politcal forum, it was moved to comedy though... where it belongs. BTW, just as most generalizations about conservatives are untrue, most generalizations in the beginning of this thread about liberals are untrue as well.

I must say though I am glad I fall right in the middle....LOL

[QuakrTrakr]

I must say though I am glad I fall right in the middle....LOL

Stay in the middle, it's safer there. Whew! As long as your not driving!:lol:

[HTC]

Hope we can still add to this one....

25. You have to believe Al Gore was really the one elected but had it stolen away from him.

[QuakrTrakr]

26. Air America is some gooood programming.
27. The Ice Age didn't pan out, so let's try Global Warming instead.

[HTC]

28. You have to believe child a rapist needs therapy instead of long prison sentences.

29. You have to believe Hillary really just cared about New York when she moved there and had no long term plan.

30. You have to believe Bill and Hillary are still married.

[QuakrTrakr]

31. Al Gore deserved that Emmy!
32. Al Gore invented the internet.

[HTC]

33. Sean Hannity is the anti-christ.

[QuakrTrakr]

34.Dittos! (Rush)

[QuakrTrakr]

35. Get the troops out of Iraq and Afganastan, but send them to Darfour!

[DaveW731]

36. Have a total lack of a sense of humor......:evilsmile

[HTC]

37. Barney Frank is mainstream.

[HTC]

(Can't believe I missed this one until now)

38. John Kerry is a war hero.

[QuakrTrakr]

39. Gavin Newsom is an American Hero.

[HTC]

40. Kimberly Guilfoyle wasn't good enough for Gavin Newsome anyways.

41. More laws will reduce crime.

[QuakrTrakr]

42. If we register all guns, crime will go down.

[QuakrTrakr]

43. If we put a serial number on every bullet, we'll be able to tell who fired the gun.

[HTC]

Raising the minimum wage will not raise consumer prices.

[HTC]

Drilling in ANWR will not reduce our dependency on foreign oil and will cause caribou not to mate.

[QuakrTrakr]

Slant drilling in the Great Lakes will destroy the marsh for the cormorant.

[HTC]

The mole on Jennifer's face is kind of hot.

[QuakrTrakr]

The mole on Jennifer's face is kind of hot.
ROTFLMAO! To be politically correct, she IS hotter than John Engler. But not by much. :lol:

[brybrain]

"Believe oil comapanies making billions of dollars in profit shouldn't get federal subsidies!" smack!!!
That's rich! How about this one:
"Believe you should run the government pay-as-you-go instead of by deficit spending!" Hahaha!
How stupid those Libs are!!!
"Believe that our ports shouldn't be run by the nation of Dubai!" Zing!
What is wrong with them!
"Believe that our trout streams should be protected against pollution and excessive withdrawals!"
Like anyone cares if there will be trout for our kids to catch someday!
At least those silly liberals are good for a laugh!

[QuakrTrakr]

"Believe oil comapanies making billions of dollars in profit shouldn't get federal subsidies!" smack!!!
That's rich! How about this one:
"Believe you should run the government pay-as-you-go instead of by deficit spending!" Hahaha!
How stupid those Libs are!!!
"Believe that our ports shouldn't be run by the nation of Dubai!" Zing!
What is wrong with them!
"Believe that our trout streams should be protected against pollution and excessive withdrawals!"
Like anyone cares if there will be trout for our kids to catch someday!
At least those silly liberals are good for a laugh!
What flavor Kool-Aid do you drink?
This is in the HUMOR thread. Start your own "conspiracy thoery" thread. Go away.

[KLR]

#48- Support illegal immigration. With out the illegal's there'd be no one to accept the welfare checks.

[gregm]

27. The Ice Age didn't pan out, so let's try Global Warming instead.

DING DING DING --- We have a winner

(:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :D )

[gregm]

#49:

Believe that Bowling for Columbine, The Day after Tommorrow, and Inconvenient Truth are all true Documentaries

#50:

And lets not forget the most important Liberal Mantra of them all, particulary with liberal media:

NEVER LET FACTS GET IN THE WAY OF A GOOD STORY

#51:

Granholm is the best thing for Michigan, Bush causes all the jobs to leave the state (even though 49 others states are trying to figure out how to spend a surplus and MI has a $3Billion dollar deficit???)

[eddiejohn4]

52- Michael Moore is a great american and great film maker:lol: 53- and Al frankin is a deep thinker:)

[brybrain]

What flavor Kool-Aid do you drink?
This is in the HUMOR thread. Start your own "conspiracy thoery" thread. Go away. That Kool-aid line just never gets old! I love it! Still don't understand what the "conspiracy thoery" thing is all about. But if you..um... want me to...go away.....I...will leave :sad:. But you had BETTER not try to post on the "conspiracy thoery" thread :Modified_, cause it'll be just for liberals! Even if they're NOT funny!

[fasthunter]

53- The second amendment doesn't really mean anything. It's outdated and......Oh don't worry we won't take away you're right to hunt!

54- If we just leave the terrorists alone they will play nice.

55- Illigal immigrants deserve social security benefits.

[fasthunter]

56- Bill Clinton was the greatest president ever:yikes: :yikes:

Side note.....None of these are my views.

[dmccririe]

Teddy Kennedy's plan: "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.":)

[gregm]

Teddy Kennedy's plan: "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.":)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I think we have a new winner!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[brybrain]

Teddy Kennedy's plan: "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.":) It's hard not to laugh at that! :lol:

[WILDCATWICK]

#58 Beleives that trees and plants have feeling thus should be counted on for votes.

#59 Beleives everyone should wear butt plugs to cut down on global warming.

#60 Beleives in every conspiracy theory ever made.

#61 Made up every conspiracty theory ever made.

[Mark Turner]

#59 needs to be on the "How to be a good conservative thread" Seems to apply:lol: